For Kai (sniff, sniff..)

Yup..I also never knew to what extent 25 pages of colored cut cartolina can affect my life. But I was beyond happy to share it with my Royal Sissies. This entry could have been an email, but I decided to publish it as a blog mainly because I cannot deny what will be the heart of these words and most importantly, the beauty of our friendship.

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Yesterday was an emotional torture. I was annoyed, irked and was impatient that our Royal Christmas Party-turned-Flores de Mayo did not turn out as it was supposed to be. It was over in a bat of an eyelash. Heck! We didn't even had a group shot! But nevertheless, vexation could not be on my head upon seeing the four of you, the crown still prevailed on high.

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I arrived home looking at my new books. I almost forgot I tucked your letter inside. As I read it, tears streamed on my cheeks from the second paragraph until the rest of the night. I know it was an emotionally-light letter. But I cannot help myself most especially that I was hormon-ey, and "emotional unstable" as Queencie also is. haha!

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I always say, "People Always Leave" because it happens to me all the time. It always hurt because those people leaving are always one of the closest in my heart. Until now, I cannot decipher the reason why. They say, when people live, we die a little. I won't deny that I will die a little. But I promise you it will be just a little, a tiny bit even. I will really try to maintain it at that.

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I can assure you that I will miss you, badly if ever. I will miss having YM chats and frequent Plurk replies. I will miss going nuts for an online book find and deciding what to buy or what not to buy. I will miss going out to malls, occasionally seeing a movie, sipping coffee or even having our usual unhealthy snacks. I won't forget the overly heated room of your which is as messy as mine.

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But what i can promise you more that I've assured you is we will get over this. We wont hold calls or texts barred. We will still be updating each other no matter how bitchy our teachers are or how hard lessons will be or even how messy and tragic and whatever-you-call-it our love lives are. Stash of peperworks can be set aside for royal calls. We could still reserve a seat for you if we go out in Coffee Break, McDo or Chowking if you want! hahaha! I would even keep my room messy para patas ta! hahaha! Going to Manila and studying Dentistry isn't such a bad thing as being exiled to Madagascar. Beyond the tears that are clouding my eyes right now is the hope that the other end of the People Always Leave quote will come. You are one of the few that I trust to "come back", and I mean come back whole and the same as you used to be. I will hold on to that letter that the memories in our diary won't stop at that. Ipaship kun dapat ipaship!

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I know I might sound overly acting. It's not like you will be staying there forever. It's not like you are dying or I am(knock on the hardest wood). You will just be "visiting" Manila. But this stupid "leaving" thing is making me vulnerable again, rather making us vulnerable. All of us had shed a tear about this upcoming circumstance. Kulang na lang, we will have a tear compact instead of blood compact! hahaha!

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I won't be here tomorrow for lunch. I will be in Bacolod the whole day. I will come to accept it that this is the "weaning thing"..Grr! But I still hope to see you on Monday with Queencie. No Goodbyes. Just hellos for what lies ahead.

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Love you Bestie and Royal Sissy!

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PS. Send me your complete address in Manila, I might want to ship my online buys there to save shipping...haha! Ubos na kwarta ko sa libro! Apir ta!

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Love and Bliss!